clean food for my messy life
Okay, before you think I’m either supermom OR that I think my kids are perfect—rest assured. Neither of those things are true.
In fact, I spend most of my days wondering what in the name of Sam Hill I’m really doing. I am most definitely not a supermom, and I’ll be the first to tell you that my kids are not perfect.
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I remember one of my friends saying this YEARS ago in reference to Jesus— that His presence is our present. (Shoutout to YOU if you are reading).
At that time it was a very stirring statement, but like all novel things and revelations, over time it became less of a wowing revelation and more common knowledge in my life.
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Do you ever feel like you just need a break from parenting? If so, it’s probably because you do need a break. And let’s make it clear up front that needing a break is not a bad thing. It isn’t a reflection of your parenting, and it certainly isn’t a reflection of your love for your child. It’s a reflection of your very human needs. And those needs have to be met if you want to thrive as a parent. So, moms, let’s talk about why we all need a time out and how it can really help us throughout our day.
If you know me or even if you keep up with my blog, you might know that I have one super feisty little lady. My baby, who is now thirteen months, has been nothing less than a fireball from the day she was born. I shared an article a few months ago about what it looks like to love her so much it hurts. And that remains true for us. I love her so much it hurts. And, I love her so much it hurts.…
Anybody else out there spend your entire life dreaming of becoming a mom? For as far back as I can remember, I looked forward to having babies. I had very vivid dreams of my life as a mom, and longed for the fulfillment of that dream. Even still, I had equally vivid dreams of other things in the midst of parenthood. While I never wanted a “career” in the conventional sort of way, I knew I wanted to “do something” with my life beyond being a mom. And if you are reading this and thinking that being a mom is doing something with your life, you are right! My point today isn’t that being a mom isn’t enough, or that it cannot be your identity. My point is that too many women lose their identity in motherhood, and it doesn’t have to happen.
You see, when I was a child, I loved all the babies. I wanted them all. I imagined my life as a mom, and I loved everything I saw. I wanted nothing more than to raise children. But I also saw so much more than that. I didn’t see myself as a mom who just stayed at home and cleaned the house all day… and I certainly didn’t see myself folding piles of laundry and ironing my husband’s work shirts all day every day (because that wouldn’t be a dream, it would be a nightmare).
I saw myself continuing to dream even after my dream of becoming a mom was fulfilled.
I saw myself continuing to be my own person rather than living through my children. And I never dreamed I would lose my identity in motherhood….
My dearest Sadie,
One year. 365 days. 8760 hours. That is the amount of time I have known you on the outside. But the amount of time I have truly known and loved you is far greater. From the moment you were conceived, I knew you carried a spark that would bring light to dark places. I knew you. The way you danced inside me was magic to my soul. The way you kicked with such strength and power was such a beautiful indication of the strength and power by which you would live. Before you even took your first breath, I saw you. I saw you, my daughter.
And then you came. And you did not disappoint. You entered the world with such beauty and grace, and changed my heart as you came, reconciling me unto the Lord.
You, my daughter, changed my life. You will always be my first born, and you will always be the one who made me a mom….
This is likely the most raw thing I will share for quite some time. It’s something I play with talking about, but never find the courage to follow through. And while I do often share “personal” things, those things still remain quite vague for the most part. Sharing something like this requires a level of clarity that goes beyond a vaguely referenced yet highly personal concept. So what is it? I want to talk about the one thing I never want my daughter to hear. And I can’t just talk about the thing itself, I have to talk about the reasons why.
But first, let me share a little back story with you. I have always been a bit of a perfectionist. I truly hate admitting that, but I also hate lying. I have a bit of a self critic that likes to thoroughly examine my every decision, my every move, my every everything.
To be real, we’ve become great friends over the years—my self critic and me….
It’s true. I give my baby sugar. I know it’s frowned upon, and I also have never been one to do things the way I am “supposed to.” But before you shake your finger at me, you need to understand a few things. It’s not simple. And at the same time, it totally is. The reasons why I give my baby sugar are endless, but I’ll take time to share just a few….
I recently read an article about finding joy in the midst of parenting, embracing all the moments, and choosing to have a positive perspective on parenting. The phrase that stuck out to me was, “it’s ALL JOY.” And being someone that is literally nuts about my baby girl, I wholeheartedly resonate with that. Somehow, in the midst of every exhausting day, and in the midst of every parenting trial, I still find being a mama to be the greatest joy I have known on this Earth. But I am also someone who happens to have a very, uh, passionate, strong willed, and determined child. She’s only ten months old and she is more confident of what she wants in life than I am, I swear. And with her determined and strong willed nature comes lots of choices for me. Do I lose my cool? Do I complain? How do I manage my stress levels? What do I do when I am genuinely frustrated with her? And with all of those choices comes the underlying choice that drives all the rest: Will I choose joy? The reality is, sometimes it hurts to love your baby. But even in the midst of that pain, there’s a joy. So how do we find that?…
When I was pregnant with my sweet girl, I remember being so stressed about what I needed. Although I was a first time mom, I did have some understanding of the fact that I wouldn’t need every single baby item on the planet. Even still, I was overwhelmed and wanted to be prepared. This led to some pretty humorous registering and re-registering, as well as purchasing and returning. Looking back, I feel it would have been beneficial to ask a few of my closest mom friends what their “must have items” were. For the sake of all of my pregnant friends and acquaintances, I decided to make a list with my own. But before I share my 5 must have baby items, I want to clarify a couple of things!
First of all, this list skips past the obvious items such as a crib and a carseat. Those things are absolute must have baby items, but this list assumes that to be a given. If you need recommendations on those things, I am happy to share with you. I will say that I *personally* recommend always buying a carseat brand new so that you know the exact condition. A carseat that has been in an accident should no longer be used. And while a carseat at a resale spot might look flawless on the outside, there’s no guarantee that it has not been in an accident. As far as a crib, I don’t see any problem with buying a used one, as long as you inspect it and it’s still fully safe, it should be fine!…
It’s no secret that I absolutely adore FALL. No matter what amazing things all the other seasons have to offer, none of them compare to the joys of Fall for me. Because I have spent a lot of time creating Fall traditions and making fun memories, I thought I would share my classic Fall bucket list with you! There’s something so special about creating bucket lists for seasons. It give you something to look forward to, goals to accomplish, and it creates a space for tons of new and fun memories! So let’s get right to it!…
