Anybody else out there spend your entire life dreaming of becoming a mom? For as far back as I can remember, I looked forward to having babies. I had very vivid dreams of my life as a mom, and longed for the fulfillment of that dream. Even still, I had equally vivid dreams of other things in the midst of parenthood. While I never wanted a “career” in the conventional sort of way, I knew I wanted to “do something” with my life beyond being a mom. And if you are reading this and thinking that being a mom is doing something with your life, you are right! My point today isn’t that being a mom isn’t enough, or that it cannot be your identity. My point is that too many women lose their identity in motherhood, and it doesn’t have to happen.
You see, when I was a child, I loved all the babies. I wanted them all. I imagined my life as a mom, and I loved everything I saw. I wanted nothing more than to raise children. But I also saw so much more than that. I didn’t see myself as a mom who just stayed at home and cleaned the house all day… and I certainly didn’t see myself folding piles of laundry and ironing my husband’s work shirts all day every day (because that wouldn’t be a dream, it would be a nightmare).
I saw myself continuing to dream even after my dream of becoming a mom was fulfilled.
I saw myself continuing to be my own person rather than living through my children. And I never dreamed I would lose my identity in motherhood….